The Midnight Writer is a freelance writer and contributor to popular websites and magazines. He's written three humor books and often writes while under the influence. Under the influence of what, he will not say.
The Midnight Writer
5 Dirty Songs Every Dude Needs in His Music Library
A man thinks about sex every six seconds. A man sings about sex every twenty seconds. Neither of those statements can be verified. Let's assume they are true.
‘Scared Straight’ for Comedians is Actually a Decent Idea
Scared Straight was a genius concept decades ago. What if it worked on comedians?
8 Sexy Guinness World Records
The ultimate authority on record-breaking achievement is the Guinness Book of World Records. Some Guinness World Records are shocking. Some are insane. More than a few are downright disgusting. There are some Guinness World Records that are damn hot. From women with massive chests to balloon busting babes, here are eight Guinness records that are pretty sexy.
Can’t Relate to Teens? Introducing Twerking for Moms
Are you a mom? Do you have a teen daughter you just don't understand?
Interactive Map Shows Just What Type of Smut Your State Searches For the Most
You can learn a lot about a person based on 1) where they live and 2) their internet history. Today I learned the US is filled with fans of creampies and not the kind made by Hostess.
10 ‘Kick-Ass’ Reasons You’d Make an AWFUL Vigilante Hero
'Kick-Ass 2' hit theaters, which means the number of masked vigilantes on the prowl will quadruple.
Comedian Kurt Braunholer Gives the Sh*ttiest Interview of All Time
Kurt Braunholer doesn’t give a crap about taking a crap. The popular comedian and host of the ‘The K Ohle’ with Kurt Braunohler podcast on the Nerdist network is very open when it comes to what goes on behind bathroom doors.
12 Bulls**t Lines People Use During Break-ups — And What They Actually Mean
Yesterday, I overheard one dude-bro discussing with another dude-bro his flatlining relationship and the correct procedure to "dump the nut job."
Erin Andrews & Charissa Thompson of Fox Sports 1 Are Our First Ever ‘Double Celeb Crushes’
In case you're unaware, or don't care about sports, Fox Sport 1 launched last week.
How to Tell a Killer Joke — With Help From Jackie ‘The Joke Man’ Martling
At least once a week, someone in the office will seize the opportunity -- either at lunch, around the coffee machine or while we're all huddled underneath our desks for a nap -- to tell the group a joke. Nine times out of ten the joke BOMBS.