We are all very aware of the long arm of the law.  We know of most things that we aren’t supposed to do.  We know that a red eight-sided sign means to stop at an intersection.  We know that when school bus lights are flashing, we need to stop until the lights go off.  We all know that you can’t steal, or murder someone, or a bevy of other laws that are just common knowledge.

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But in a most Buffalo way, there are several laws on the books in our fair city, that you may not be aware of.  And some of them will leave you shaking your head in amazement.

 

Standing Sideways in an Elevator – So I’m that guy who likes to walk into a crowded elevator, and faces the wrong direction.  You should see all the uncomfortable glances that I get.  Who knew that that is technically illegal to do in an elevator in Buffalo? The law states “one must talk to no one, and fold his hands while looking toward the door”

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Wearing Slippers after 10 pm – odds are good that if you’re reading this and you live in Western New York, you own a pair of slippers.  Hell, I own 3 myself.  But you probably didn’t know that it is illegal to wear them after 10 pm.

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Throwing a Ball at Someone’s Head – Had I known about this one as a kid, I would have ended up with a lot more than a bar of soap in my mouth.  I mean seriously, how are you supposed to play a proper game of dodgeball with this law in place? If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball.  Just don’t throw at someone’s head. Please, and thanks.
PS: This goes for snowballs as well

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Slurping Soup is Prohibited in Public – Next time you cozy up to a bowl of your favorite chicken wing soup in a public place, keep this one in mind.  Odds are you have broken this one in the past, but if the soup police catch you slurping… NO SOUP FOR YOU!

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Hanging Clothes Without a Permit – So I haven’t actually hung my clothes outside since I was a kid, growing up at my parents’ house.  So, thanks to the miracle of modern technology known as the dryer, this one hasn’t been an issue for me.  But, if you like to get the crisp outdoor laundry smell, make sure you have your paperwork in order.

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Carrying an Ice Cream Cone, In Your Pocket on Sundays – I would love to have lived in a time where people were walking around on Sundays with ice cream cones in their pockets with reckless abandon.  I mean, seriously, this was such a big problem that they had to put this law on the books?

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